Faith

I'm not even quite sure how to start this post.  

All I can say is God doesn't give you anything you can't handle.

And He always provides.

Allow me to explain.  

When I wrote this post everything about our future was up in the air. The only thing I knew for sure was that we would get through it and I was right where I always wanted to be-home with my baby.

With lots of prayer and sacrifice, days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months, and now, almost a year later, we're still here.  We're making it, and I am so thankful.

There are so many things to be thankful for.  Our health and happiness are the first that come to mind. 

 I never thought that I would be able to stay home for a year, but all I can say about our experience is that we were so blessed and it was all in God's plan.  

A couple weeks ago on July 18th I got a message from my old director.  I frantically called her back only to get her voicemail.  I was imagining all the things she could be calling about and had to wait almost a week before she finally called me back and I got some big news.

  

I got my job back!

And I had an interview!

When I was looking for jobs about a month ago I saw that my old program (ECI) was hiring for a manager position.  At that time I didn't know that I had a chance of getting my job back, but I said what the heck and applied.  So, when I talked to the director she said that I could have my job back, but I could also interview for the manager position.  I decided to go for it and now it's another waiting game to see which job I'll be doing.

While the details are still being worked out, it is such a relief of a lot of stress that we were feeling.

 While I'm emotional about having to leave Emma, I know this is the best thing for our family at this time.  It's going to be a big adjustment for all of us, but just like before, we'll get through it.

I can't help to think though, 15 months have flown by and where did the time go?  I only worked for a month and a half of that time (from the end of my maternity leave to my last day before being layed off.)

What did we do in those 15 months? 

 Did I spend enough time with Emma?  

How much time did I waste?

Did I take enough pictures?

Did I document it well enough?

I could go on and on, but I have to stop myself.  Just like I've done before, I have to hand it over to God and know that only he knows the plan.  And he knows what I can handle.